Mother’s Day can be a time to celebrate those who have done so much for you or receive welcome gratitude from your family members. However, Mother’s Day can also be an incredibly challenging time for many people who have lost their mum, child or have cut ties with their family.
Although it can be a happy Sunday for many, it can stir up feelings of grief and sadness for others. Here at Inscripture, we pride ourselves on being a sensitive brand that brings a smile & feeling of comfort by making Ashes Jewellery and other Memorial Jewellery. We have worked with many people who have experienced bereavement so we understand that grief can be incredibly challenging during holidays such as Mother’s Day. Here are a few tips for coping when you may feel anxious about Mother’s Day approaching and dealing with loss.
Grief on Mother’s Day
Grieving the loss of your mother
The most apparent reason for feeling a mountain of grief on Mothering Sunday is when you have lost your mother. Even if your mum passed many years ago, this special day of family celebrations could often reignite feelings of grief as the day feels empty without your mother there.
Grieving the loss of another female family member
Although the loss of your mother may be a common reason for grief on Mother’s Day, you may also experience these feelings if your spouse is grieving the loss of their mother. In addition, you may also feel grief for the loss of another close female in your family, such as your aunt or grandmother.
Grieving the loss of your mother with dementia
If your mother has dementia, you may also feel a sense of grief as your mum is not the same as she was on previous Mother’s Days. As a result, you may feel a sense of loss and grief before you physically lose her. If you struggle with grief specifically associated with your mother having dementia, there is information available through Dementia UK, Alzheimer’s Society (UK) and the Alzheimer’s Association (US).
Grieving the loss of your child
All loss is heartbreaking. However, losing your child is even more painful as no parent expects to outlive their children. If you are a Mother yourself, you may wish to reject all celebrations on Mother’s Day, for it may be too painful if you have lost a child or grandchild.
Sorrowing after a break in a relationship within your family
Another reason you may be feeling a surge in the emotions often associated with grief, could be if you have broken ties with either or both sides of your family. Although your mother or another caregiver may still be alive and healthy, you could experience grief, sorrow or loneliness due to the loss in the relationship. This loss of a relationship has probably been a significant part of your life, and therefore, you may feel triggered by events and holidays.
How To Cope With Grief On Mother’s Day
Talk to people you trust
In every stage of grief, it helps to talk to people you trust, such as a close friend, another family member, a therapist, or your GP, and ask for support. Although opening up about your grief may feel impossible, you will likely find it is a subject worth approaching. If you struggle to start the conversation, try messaging your friend or loved one ahead of time to make it easier to bring up your grief when you see them in person. Alternatively, you may wish to wear a piece of fingerprint jewellery to symbolise your loss, making it easier for others to ask you about your feelings about Mother’s Day intuitively.
Write down your feelings
If you don’t wish to talk to others about your grief, you could spend a short while writing your feelings down or writing a letter to your mum about what you are going through. This can help you realise how you feel, and putting your emotions into words can help you feel more in control of the feelings.
Have a digital detox
Although you can usually opt-out of Mother’s Day-related content online, inevitably, there will be some content that slips through the cracks in your email inbox or on social media. Therefore, you may find it helpful to avoid your phone as much as you can over the weekend of Mother’s Day.
Allow your feelings to surface
Pushing back your grief won’t make it disappear. In fact, you may end up making yourself feel worse in the long run as your grief could snowball over time. Allow yourself to sit with the grief and acknowledge it.
It can also be exhausting to pretend you are doing ok to other people constantly, so sometimes being honest with yourself is the first step to allowing yourself to process the emotions. Then you can talk about them with others.
More tips for coping with grief
Although we are a long way from the end of the year, you may also wish to read our previous post about grief at Christmas time as many of the tips we shared about helping grief during the holidays may help you or your loved ones on Mother’s Day.
How To Help Others Who Are Grieving on Mother’s Day
No magic wand can cure your loved ones of their grief on Mother’s Day. However, you can offer support, a shoulder to cry on and assist your friends and family in any way you can to help them get through this occasion. If your love language is gifting, you could also purchase your friend a piece of Handwriting Jewellery or a Photo Necklace to show your compassion through a meaningful piece.
At Inscripture, we are respectful while creating such meaningful pieces. Therefore, we always allow our customers to opt-out of our marketing materials about Mother’s Day. If you can, set up a system for your own business or suggest this as an option to your employer to make it easy for those who are experiencing grief during this time to avoid triggers wherever possible.