Have you been asked to be a bridesmaid in a friend or close relative’s wedding? Congratulations! It’s quite an honour that someone thinks so highly of you. Just know that this isn’t something you can just show up to and hope for the best. There is effort involved. Being a bridesmaid comes with a lot of responsibilities with you being in charge of many things. Fortunately for you, we are going to share with you the ultimate guide to being the best bridesmaid you can be.
Always put the bride first
As a bridesmaid, your loyalty is to the bride. You will need to be there for her and help her with some of the most important decisions she will make for her special day. Even if you don’t agree with her style or the decisions she makes, remember that your loyalty is to her. It’s your job to ensure she feels good about herself and her decisions.
Understand her needs
Every bride is different, so find out exactly what she wants or needs from you. If she is not clear about her expectations of you, don’t hesitate to ask. The bride might only want you to show up for her wedding or expect you to take on a more active role in the planning of the big day.
Be a team player
There is a high possibility that there will be more than one bridesmaid for the wedding. Ensure that you put on a united front, even if you don’t agree with the other bridesmaid’s suggestions. Remember that you are all there for the same reason, which is to help ensure that the bride’s big day goes well.
If at any time you don’t get along well with the other bridesmaids, you risk ruining the wedding. Although there might be little issues within the group, keep them to yourself. Keep in mind that at the end of the day, you are all there for your best friend.
The bride’s always right (even when she’s wrong)
It’s always good to remember that the wedding is about the bride and not you. If, for instance, she chooses an outfit that you feel is hideous, try and voice your opinion in a nice, subtle manner. If afterwards she still wants you to wear it that is what you should do. If the bride asks you to do something that you wouldn’t do in your wedding then, again it’s best just to get on with it for the sake of the harmony of the day. For most brides, the wedding day is a day they have envisioned since their childhood so it’s important to try not to ruin her big day by not cooperating.
Share your opinion sparingly
There are instances when the bride may seek your opinion about something. While it’s okay to be honest and voice your opinion, if your response causes her distress, back off and ask her what she thinks instead. While it’s important to be open and honest with her, a lot of the time the bride is just looking for validation of their own ideas and so often giving them a conflicting opinion won’t achieve anything other than stressing her out.
Choosing the venue
Although some couples may know exactly where they want to hold their wedding, there are those who don’t. As an awesome and dedicated bridesmaid, take an evening or two to discuss the available options and help them to look at what’s available within their budget.
Trying on wedding dresses is an important part of planning for the big day. Your role as a bridesmaid when choosing a wedding dress is a little tricky. You need to be able to strike a balance between being constructive and putting the bride to be off the dress of her dreams. Take the time to find out beforehand what she has in mind so that you don’t blurt out something hurtful like “lace dresses suck!” when it’s the style she has her heart set on.
Planning the hen do
This is the fun part of the whole wedding preparation process. It gives you a chance to blow off a bit of steam from all the planning. Although it’s usually the bridesmaids’ job to plan a wild night out with the girls, we highly recommend that you get some inspiration from the bride. Does she want you to go all out on a trip of a lifetime to Las Vegas or we should prefer an intimate, low-key event? Once again, it’s important to plan the hen she would love, not what you want to do. That said, don’t limit your imagination when planning a hen do as there is no right or wrong as long as the bride gets the send-off she deserves.
Have a wedding budget
You should know that being a bridesmaid will most likely cost you money. From the dress, shoes, bag, hair and makeup, the hen do and bridal showers, it all costs money. It’s a good idea to find out early on what costs the bride and groom are willing to pay for and what costs they expect you to cover yourself.
Give her a gift
It’s a nice touch to give the bride a gift the night before or morning of the wedding and it might just notch you up from a good bridesmaid to an awesome one! Get her something personal that shows her how much you care about her and how honoured you are to be part of her big day. A wedding bouquet charm or personalised bracelet would be the ideal gift that would mean the world to her.
Practice on your speech
If you are going to make a speech, doing some practice helps as it ensures that you don’t spend the entire time staring down at your notes. There will likely be lots of speeches to get through so it’s always a good idea to keep it relatively short and light hearted. Try to part with some words of advice, and wish the newlyweds a long and happy marriage.
Finally, the wedding ceremony is the ultimate party and you are privileged to be a big part of it. So dance, laugh, mingle and enjoy the day. If you have you carried off your bridesmaid’s duties to a tee then you’ll have earned it!
Use these tips to help your best friend get the perfect wedding day by providing her with the support that she deserves.